Thursday, June 27, 2013

Today marks the four year mark.  In remembrance, I’ve decided to listify someof the most important things I learned from him (I'm sure I missed some though so forgive me).

They are:

- Be patient

- Don’t hold grudges, even when you know you’re right.

- Don’t ever spare the horses.  After all, James really does need to gethome.

- Spend time with your kids.

- Teaching is a great profession.

- Tar is slow, but not as slow as you.

- Mother is to be honored and revered.  And don’t talk back to her ever.

- Save ten percent of what you earn.

- It’s okay to like nice things, just don’t expect to everhave any.

- Everybody has worth and deserves to be respected, even ifthey do hang out in the North parking lot.

- Christmas is coming.

- It’s fun to play/watch sports, but it’s even more fun towork on the yard.

- The scriptures are magic. 

- Nothing compares to British food and humor.

- Learn to appreciate good books and good music.

- Go on a mission, graduate from college, and get married inthe temple or else.

- All you need to stay alive is bread and milk.

- Most people have good backs.

- Greatness is in the everyday

Sunday, June 9, 2013

The Rules

I like rules.  I have certain rules that govern my life.  I’ve decided to list those rules here. 

Here they are:

Editor’s Note: Some I'm better at following than others. 

Rule #1—Set expectations low.  You avoid a lot disappointment that way.

Rule #2—Try to talk to people as little as possible.  Socially handicapped people (like me) should have an allotment of approximately 3.4 sentences per day.  Don't exceed that.

Rule #3—Be nice.

Rule #4—Whenever somebody tells you a story about something that happened to them, there’s probably a little bit of truth to it, but only a little bit.

Rule #5—Most people really are good people. 

Rule #6—Always root for the underdog or, if we’re talking about a relationship, the less smooth person.  (For example, in Gilmore Girls, Marty was always my favorite).  

Rule #7—Keep the outside door shut.  If it’s open, bugs will get in.

Rule #8—Eat whatever food you like because who knows what diet specialist is right.

Rule #9—If the Mrs. ain’t happy, ain’t no one happy.  So keep the Mrs. happy.

Rule #10—Don’t swear.  When you’re mad, you can throw things and break things and punch things, just don’t swear.

Rule #11—18-30 no more than two kids.  (No longer applies, but it served me well).

Rule #12—When you are listening to an opinionated person, just smile and nod.  After all, they don’t really want to know what you think, they just want you to know what they think.

Rule #13—Don’t eat onions (and if, when referring to a particular dish that has onions someone says, “don’t worry, you can’t taste them,” don’t believe them).

Rule #14—If and whenever possible, avoid talking to people on the phone.

Rule #15—Whatever Dumbledore, Yoda, and/or DCS Foyle say is gospel truth.

Rule #16—Generally speaking, most people think they work hard and use their time wisely.  Keep this in mind when you talk to lazy people.

Rule #17—No excuses.

Rule #18—If you have no social skills and you want people to like you, give them stuff.

Rule #19—Niemand kann mich ausnutzen, solange ich geben will.

Rule #20—Don’t worry about what stupid people think or say.     

Thursday, June 6, 2013

Commentation


The following necessitate comment:

-          I went to high school graduation a couple of weeks ago.  I cried.  I always cry at those things.  I’m a sucker for nostalgia.

-          I have a cell phone.

-          About 85.43 percent of the time I hold Gemma Grace, she cries.

-          My friend Stephen E. Frandsen and his wife are going to have a baby.  I cried when I found out.  How dare they corrupt the earth with their progeny.       

-          I don’t care if the government knows my personal information.  Just so long as they don’t make fun of my middle name, I’m fine.

-          I do not like the Miami Heat.  I’m not a very good Christian when I watch them play.  I get real mad. 

-          I’m reading this book called Divergent.  I don’t hate it. 

-          I also just read this book called The Mysterious Benedict Society.  I didn’t hate it either.  In fact, I might have cried at some point while reading it.

-          The Mrs. and I watched this movie (edited) called Dear John.  Not bad.  Then a week or two later we watched Safe Haven (also edited).  Not bad either (in fact, I might have been teary-eyed in both).  Then a couple weeks later we watched The Notebook.  Boring.